Okay, let me take a moment to whine about some stresses. There are a couple of things I’m waiting on, but I’ll only talk about one for now. Finances. This holiday season is very difficult for us. It is so true that people live within their means. When you don’t have money (I would much rather, right now, work part time to spend more time with Lily at home in her formative months than work full time and make more money), the Christmas season is just a tad sad. The pressure to stay in the race with consumerism is hard. I feel the pressure to be able to buy all the things our nieces and nephews want for Christmas. Showing up on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day to the family dinner without presents for the nieces and nephews when everyone else is able to give them something would be such a heartbreaking experience for them. We can’t do that. But goodness, we can barely afford to pay all our bills this month. It’s hard on us right now.
Times like these, I can appreciate those who don’t celebrate Christmas. While I love the joy and the togetherness of the holiday, the pressure to buy buy buy and give give give all the material things, especially for little kids, is absolutely ridiculous. When you’re older and you’re a “wise” adult, you see that it’s not what you get for Christmas, it’s the coming together that counts. But kids are brainwashed in our society to believe that Christmas is Santa Claus and Santa Claus is presents. Heck, I remember that as a child, that was what I believed and since our family didn’t celebrate Christmas, I just figured Santa forgot about me every year. It’s a sad way to live for a child.
Christmas is complicated. It’s a confusing holiday, and I think that capitalist consumers and advertisers make it complicated for just this reason: they want to confuse us and brainwash us into thinking that in order to have the lovely “togetherness” that we so desire, we also have to buy buy buy. Lots and lots of toys and gadgets and gizmos that will be forgotten about just a year later, so that we can do it all over again.
When you have money and you can afford it, Christmas isn’t so bad. In fact, it’s actually FUN. I loooove shopping for other people. I love making gifts for people. I love giving people things that I know they would enjoy and love. I love seeing the faces of our nieces and nephews when they open their presents on the eve and the day. I just love all that. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve fallen prey to the Christmas idealism and the consumerism as well. It’s just that… it becomes a lot more transparent when you’re struggling. With the economy down, and people getting laid off, and the Canadian dollar not doing so well, and everything else compounded, sometimes all I want to do during this season is run and hide and sleep it off until January gets here.
Because we all know, there are so many other things we need to pay for, like key man insurance and car payments and electric bills and water and sewer and trash and cable and and and… What do I do with this knowledge that Christmas is a trap? Just grind my teeth, save every single penny we have, and buy buy buy until we drop. Then hope and work towards the next year and hope that it will be easier.
